Most wanted - plant killer

   This week my daughter came home with a plant. She asked if we could plant it right away. I was told it was a tree.

   Um, Ok. It just looks like a bare twig with a bunch of roots dangling at the end. But its roots were thoughtfully wrapped in a wet paper towel. And every kid at school got one. She promised to take care of it all by herself. She even found a pot and planted it to get it started.

Because my daughter knows something that the school doesn't know.

   Her mother is a notorious plant murderer. Wanted in our state for purchase and slaughter of innocent plants. Know to decimate small patches of garden in the short space of two seasons. In this mom's unstoppable crime spree there have been a long list of victims: Mother-in-Law Tounges, Spider Plants, Roses, Dogwood Trees, and even cactus. Did you know that you were not supposed to water cactus every day?

That makes the school an accessory.

   Evidence of my plant killing skills can be seen at every turn. Most of the flower pots in our house

are empty. See the pretty tulips that I received? Another testimony to my decidedly not so green thumbs. Oh well, plant the bulbs, right? They will come back next year! Won't they?

   That is not to say that we don't love growing things or that we do not have things growing around our house, because we do. There are lots of trees and plants and stuff. You see, we have what is called a Darwin Yard. Where the most fittest, heartiest plants thrive and survive.

   Tulips have proven to be winners of the Survival Awards each spring, despite numerous plantings and re-plantings.  Someone told me that the bulbs are supposed to be planted a certain way, and at a certain time of the year.....Not these bad boys! Little bit of shade, they don't care. Competing with other plant species? No problem! Dig a hole, throw them in, cover with dirt and they figure out the rest! Quite nicely, I might add.

   Another winner would be the massive lilac bushes that we have growing all around our back yard. The entire neighborhood smells of lilac as soon as they bloom. Granted, they were here when we bought the house, but look how well they thrive with our care.

We also try our hand at growing a vegetable garden each year. See, we have started our seedling soup plantings. Seeds are supposed to float, right?

   Once we see leaves start, we will faithfully transfer the beans, bell peppers and cucumbers to our pocket sized garden patch (that only suffers from a little bit of shade in the morning and in the evening). To this we will add lettuce, radishes and carrots. From there we will water them (when we remember on our watering days) and, um, forget to weed them. But weeding is really over-rated if you ask me. And the weeds serve an important purpose in our garden plot. They help keep the intentionally planted produce thinned out properly so that the plants can grow nice and thick. Worked with the radishes and carrots - mostly. And other plants have made it through our ministrations too. See, we had a great harvest last year....or was it the year before? Nothing like fresh, tasty veggies!

We won't talk about the later harvest and the cucumber balls. 

    

    Thankfully, our friends are gifted gardeners that grow large and overflowing gardens of thick, ripe, juicy vegetables and are more than happy to share their bounty, so we eat plenty of fresh produce.

Not too sure about this tree thing though. Hopefully the school won't face any charges.

   I am pleased to say this year, we do have a fine crop coming in already...

Tech Savvy from the Techno-Challenged

   I love technology. Technology is my friend. And I don't say that lightly either. Although I am currently in a non-income producing status, I use technology heavily to get jobs done in an efficient, coordinated manner. I may start a blog post at the dentist office (No Dr. I am not playing games on my phone), then finish it up at home on my laptop. I keep shopping lists that are shared with family so that any of us can stop at the store on the way home. Photos on my phone become posts shared with family and friends, printed albums for keepsakes, and bribery if needed. Recently I created a spreadsheet for a lighting design on my phone (from up on the catwalk), then later updated and tweaked it on the designer's laptop to make our work easier. After that I shared the document in the Google Drive so everyone who needed it could access, and those that needed to make changes were given editing rights. Life is grand! In our family we use computers, tablets, phones, digital cameras and MP3 players. Even an IPod here and there, if we have to....

   I love wireless printers and Bluetooth. I love the internet with all of its resources. Heck, we could not do homework many nights around here without it! Got a question, either Google it or ask Siri. I love the fact that I could take a picture while I was writing, upload it to my Picasa and then insert it in this blog - all within minutes. 

   But sometimes technology is my enemy.

   Ever notice how your best friends can become your worst enemies? They know so much about you. They carry so much of your information. You are dependent upon them. Then they dump you. Just like that. With little or no warning. All your precious photos, gone in the blink of an eye. The most recent copy of your resume, toast. The last 100 pages of your best seller, history.

   And you didn't even have to drop the bugger, spill your coffee on it or abuse it in any way. All you did was use it. Not carelessly, but conscientiously, with a virus protector and ad software to prevent malicious damage from being done to your precious cargo.

   Well, you may have let the kids use it.

   Worse, when it happens, you don't know how to fix it. If you are like me, you are a USER, not a PROGRAMMER. Even looking up the problem isn't much help. What you read looks like hieroglyphics from ancient tomb with scarcely a recognizable symbol. And the ones you think you recognize actually mean something else. And a lot of what you read simply tells you that you are screwed. I can see you nodding your head with sympathy. You have been there. You know what I am talking about.

   But since I love technology, I struggle on. This is not the first time (and probably not the last time) that I have done battle with a computer. I have become a little more savvy over the years. I now save everything on a cloud. Pictures, documents, notes and memos. And I use several different clouds depending on what I need it to do. Oh sure, I have heard comments like: "What if the cloud dies? Or someone hacks it?" My response is: "What if my house burns down? Or someone breaks in?" Same results. From a technical standpoint, I do the best I can do. I even have a physical hard drive back up.

   Nevertheless, it is still devastating when your technology comes down with a "virus" or even a "cold." It is bad enough that the technology becomes obsolete in a matter of weeks, or you do drop it down the stairs, or in the sewer, but to have it deliberately disabled is enough to make you pull your circuits out!

   As savvy as thought I had become, it happened. My computer caught a "cold." What is a cold, you might ask. Unlike a virus, which can totally destroy your computer and wipe out files, a cold is a program that slows your computer down, makes it difficult to use and can be hard to get rid of. In my case, my computer caught an ad-ware cold. Yes, I made that term up. And yes, you may use it.

     Fortunately, I am no longer daunted by my technology. I now live with the motto "It's already broke, what can I do, break it more?" So with that attitude, I used my precious spare time to research the how to undo whatever I did to make things broke in the first place. In the case of my computer "cold" I found a few articles that talked about registry directories and software I could buy to fix the problem, but what I wanted was to find out how I got the problem in the first place so I would not do it again. Then I wanted to know how to get rid of the problem without it costing me. What I first learned was pretty eye opening. My problem probably downloaded with a program I had loaded onto the computer. Seems that when you download programs, they don't have to be real clear about what they download with the actual software you are trying to get. As a matter of fact, free software doesn't have to even ask you if it is okay to download adware. Hmmm. Should I tell you that some of the software you buy has added, unwanted software too? Or is that just too wrong to be mentioned?

   So I Goggled the last program I had loaded onto my computer with the word adware. Guess what, I brought the problem into my computer. All by myself. I had downloaded Handbrake - free software for video editing, and highly rated at that. However, what I did not know was that the software required the user to download adware (such as JollyWallet and DefaultTabSearch). Now, to get rid of the unwanted bugger. Several articles suggested a simple fix - enter your control panel, select programs, type in the name of the unwanted adware program and uninstall. But after a search in my programs (via control panel - install/uninstall programs) I could not find the adware programs named in connection with the software I downloaded. I hit a circuit stone wall. How was I going to figure out what to delete? 

   I started by deleting the program I had last installed (Handbrake), but the ad-ware persisted. I could not find an article that could point to the culprit. I looked at list of adware to see if I could find a name to go with the programs in my registry (I checked Malware-Dectetive). I even tried searches using the infected computer, but all I pulled up were - ADS! Ugh. I put my head in my hands and wiggled the mouse, scrolling pointlessly across the screen, opening and closing the ads. Then I noticed at the bottom of one of the ads a notation. The name of the adware company! Using this gem, I went back to my trusty control panel and into my add/remove programs. I searched out the offending adware name and clicked uninstall and held my breath.

   Would it work? Most of the articles I read said that adware (also know as greyware for anyone who really wants to know) was difficult, if not impossible to remove. Other articles used a techno-speak that I could not understand. Still others talked about the dreaded registry. Registries are for people who know what they are doing, (or getting married or having a baby). I won't go there!

   Uninstall complete. I got a message to reboot. I was still holding my breath. It is amazing how long you can hold your breath when you need to. I mean, it was like out of one of those action movies where the ship blows up and the hero swims for like twenty minutes underwater without coming up for air.

    AANNDDD.....It worked! I was ad-free! At no additional cost. And my computer has worked smoothly ever since. Take that Ad Blaster!

Having problems with your computer and feeling brave, take a deep breath. Remember, it is already broke. And give it a try. Hey, if I can do it, you can too. 

Consistency folks, lets strive for consistency!

    I know, I know, this coming from a blogger who can't quiet get consistent with the day of the week that she posts....or sometimes the week that she posts. The same person who sometimes has toilet Tuesdays...on Friday. The person who goes for months creating advanced meal schedules and synced grocery lists.........then can't figure out what to make for dinner for a coupla weeks at a time. Same person who uses separating dots..inconsistently! How annoying, right?

   Yet I crave consistency! If I buy Instant Vanilla Cappuccino from a company one week, I expect it to have the same flavor quality the next time I buy it. If I pick up a pair of jeans and find them to fit like a glove, I expect to find that the next pair of jeans I buy (same size from the same manufacturer) to fit the same as the first pair. If I use one email service and find there is an app for that same service, I expect to enjoy all the same features and mechanics in the app that I find on-line.

   But there is where the disappointment sets in. Chirp was the first to alert me that something was amiss with my favorite instant coffee. It still tasted great, but was slightly different. She looked up at me as if to say "Does this smell a little different to you?" She was right, it smelled a little less vanillay. Like I said, the taste was good, but not the same. Not better, not worse, just not the same.

   Then there is the tale of two jeans. The first pair I bought were an absolute wonder! Not too long (as is often the case), not baggy and perfect in the waist. As if they were custom made for me. I should have know that it was too good to be true. When I tried to find a second pair made by the same manufacturer in the same size, I was not so fortunate. So I tried a different size. And then another. Then a different style. And yet another. But to no avail. That perfect fit was not to be found again.

   So I decided to turn to my email to be more productive and take care of some business...and guess what? You bet, the app is different from the on-line version of the email service I have been using for the last two years. Worse yet, it is missing many of the features I use regularly, like groups. I thought perhaps the app did not sync properly with the groups I use on-line (all my contacts synced just fine), so I thought I would just recreate the one or two I use regularly and worry about syncing rest later. However, despite my diligence, I could not find where I could make a group. So I did some research on-line. Seems I am not the only one unable to find it. The feature simply doesn't exist in the app. Seriously? I am not talking some off beat email service, I am talking one of the major players. Further more, they engineered this app that I was using, it was not second or third party software. Now I had switched to this email service because the previous major email service I had been using upgraded and you could no longer forward attachments. I know, I could use the version on line of my current email service, but it is not as touch screen friendly as the app.

Chirp looking for the app that works

   Perhaps what I really needed to do was just kick back and relax with a good book. I was low on reading material, so I went to my local library via the internet and selected a few choice reads. Surprise surprise, they are in the middle of changing their system and upgrading, so things were not sorting as smoothly as I would have liked. Still, I made my selections and checked them out to transfer to my device. However, when I opened the app service associated with my device, there was no mechanism to manage my devices. You had to go on the internet to do that. The internet site is not exactly touch screen friendly, unless you have fingers that taper to a pin point to make your selections. Works for Chirp, but not so much for me. Using the touch pad, I managed to send the book to the device of my choosing. Thinking my struggle was over, I leaned back in my favorite chair and turned on my device. No book. Took me twenty minutes to figure out how to get my book. The service I use for reading on my device upgraded their system, and what used to automatically download to the device now had to be manually retrieved. What kind of upgrade is that?

   Annoyed and frustrated, I put all things technical aside and drove to the grocery story to pick up a few items. Twenty minutes later, I had the few items I wanted. Why is the ENTIRE store reconfigured? It took me so long to find three items I wanted that I did not have time to peruse the shelves for any impulse purchases. If they were going to reconfigure anything, couldn't it have been the parking lot? 

   Lack of consistency tends to raise frustration levels. I don't need any help...

   

   Now where did that bird get to? Chirp usually hangs out in her cage or in the living room window. Or on my laptop using the touch screen. Not like her to explore other rooms. Could she be on the computer in the study upstairs? Don't tell me she is making a change NOW. I could use a little consistency.