I wouldn't go hiking with me if I were you!

Vacation can be a wonderful time to relax, spend time with family, and explore new places...

Photo courtesy of K M Drechny

Photo courtesy of K M Drechny

In our case, however, they tend to be outright adventures!

(No, we were not involved in the accident pictured, but it is one example of what we encountered along the way. A sober reminder of safety first and thankfully only resulted in an hour and a half detour for our family.)

   This year is a prime example. I have termed our vacation 2018 Wild West Adventure!

Photo courtesy of K M Drechny

Mind you, it was a really good vacation. We saw extraordinary sights. Like the World's Largest Ball of Popcorn!

We got to ride on Jack-A-Lopes! Pictured is mom on tamed indoor Jack-A-Lope.

And we were able to spend lots and lots of time together.

All five us us.

In a crew cab pick up truck.

 For three thousand miles.

Everyone had their moments. There were bumps on the road, like completely flooded campsites. unexpected detours, road construction, animal obstruction (we saw lots and lots of animals), and of course tourists. I'm convinced they are the most dangerous creatures in the parks!

Photo courtesy K M Drechny

Despite the somewhat crowded space, both in the truck and in the camper, everyone had a good time. The weather was mostly cooperative, ranging between the mid sixties to upper seventies (fahrenheit), making it ideal weather to walk around and see the sights. We visited Yellowstone and Grand Teton National Parks,

Devils Tower, Custer State Park and the Needles, The Badlands, The National Grasslands, Countless state and national forests, Mt. Rushmore, Souix Falls, and other places that boggle the imagination.

Our trip also included a rodeo, a stop at a Buffalo Bill Dam, and a visit to Wall Drug. While we are not big back country hikers, we did indulge in short tramps along the boardwalks and climbing the numerous stairs. And as we did so, we discovered something of great importance.

Photo courtesy of K M Drechny

It is NOT a good idea to go hiking with me! 

For one, I'm invisible. On several occasions, I was stepped on by other tourists who evidently couldn't see me. In one instance (which later resulted in me visiting a medical clinic) I was literally run over by two ladies in a hurry to see some geyser or another.

As if this weren't bad enough, I also attract hail.

Yes, you read that correctly. Hail. Doesn't matter what the current weather conditions are, if I am on the trail you should be prepared for hail. Not just light hail either, but we are talking pea sized bombs that burn when they make contact with the skin.

The first time was the same day I was run over by the two lady tourists. Mind you, they were very apologetic once I became visible, even if it took them five minutes to find the translation for "I'm sorry." But honestly, I had been trying to avoid them all afternoon. I have a hiccup in my giddyup, so I'm careful to avoid my much faster moving counterparts who are unable to see me, most of whom have climbed off a tourist bus. Unfortunately, it did me little good, they still managed to find me, nearly bowling me over in the process. The collision caused me to jam my good foot, further hindering my efforts.

Photo courtesy of K M Drechny

Yet, I am not one to give up easily. Determined to make my destination, I continued on, albeit at a much slower pace. It was a beautiful day, about eighty two degrees, and the skies were sunny. I had on my favorite boonie hat, my sturdy hiking shoes, plenty of water, and was in a particularly good mood. Since it was warm out, I wore a a tank top but debated on going back to the truck to grab a long sleeve shirt, just in case. In the end, I decided I didn't want to take the extra time to navigate the parking lot.

I know better.

We traversed the mile and a half to our destination with little difficulty (except of course being run over by tourists). However, the return trip proved to be a bit more of a challenge. Not only was my pace labored, but the sky rapidly clouded over and the temperature began to drop. By the time we were halfway back to the Inn where we started, it was forty degrees cooler and was threatening to rain. I sent my daughter on ahead of me with the hopes her long legs would help her avoid the almost certain downpour to come.

She had long since disappeared down the trail when the predicted rain hit. Within minutes, I was soaked. To add insult to injury, it began to hail. Not just small pellets, but pea sized balls that sent fiery shocks along the skin everywhere it hit. There was no place to take shelter (one does not veer from the path when walking on the surface of a supervolcano with a thin crust all around), and nothing to do but trudge on. Fortunately my mother was smarter than I was and carried a jacket.

Needless to say, we made it to the Inn, bedraggled and in serious need of hot chocolate, but safe and sound. Despite the cold and wet, I was still in good spirits.

However, this was not to be the last time the weather decided to join me on a hike. Near the end of our stay in the area, we visited Jackson Lake with some friends. It was cool out, but a great day to take a walk. I opted not to go on the mile long trail. Good thing, cause guess what...

Yep, it hailed. AGAIN. This time my friend and I were close to the visitor center and I was dressed for the occasion. If you can dress for hail, that is.

Photo courtesy of K M Drechny

I determined right then and there, no walks more than a quarter mile from shelter. I was done. Finished. Completely resigned to short excursions from the truck and always carrying weather repellent clothing.

Which was just fine.

The rest of the trip was uneventful. Well, almost. It did hit one hundred and six degrees one day...

The same day we encountered forty mile an hours winds. (Why yes, I was outside for this!)

Then there was the truck itself. It hadn't been super happy about yet ANOTHER trip into the mountains and protested hauling our camper up steep grades, not to mention numerous switchbacks.

Did I mention the truck is about eighteen years old?

We were well within our GVR (gross vehicular weight), and didn't push to make the truck move faster than it wanted to go uphill (or downhill for that matter). Still, about two hundred miles from home we lost the upper gears. Having full cell signal (for the first time in nearly two weeks) and good coverage under AAA, we decide to chance it and drive home anyway. We almost made it too. Twenty-five feet from the driveway, reverse ceased to operate.

OOPS.

Hard to believe how important reverse can be. Luckily, we were able to use another vehicle to back the camper into parking place. It took a little ingenuity and gravity to maneuver the truck into the driveway.

Photo courtesy of K M Drechny

So I'm guessing this really IS the last time we use the truck to haul the camper into the mountains. But now having fixed the transmission, I'm thinking short distances over flat lands shouldn't be too much of a problem...