Going out to eat should be a fun and relaxing experience. It is a chance to reconnect with family and friends, celebrate life events, try new foods and most importantly, enjoy a meal prepped and served by someone else.
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| Awesome dinner from my travels |
What it shouldn't be is a challenge.
In a restaurant, no diners should be viewed as an inconvenience.
My recent dining experience was both a challenge AND and example of how I was viewed as an inconvenience!
Since my mom drove, I took my rolling walker. It is lighter and easier to load and unload from a car and doesn't take up much space like my other mobility equipment.
It was a hot day, so mom dropped me off at the curb, that way I wouldn't have far to walk. (Hot days equate really poor mobility for me.)
Someone came out and held the outer door for me. Another held the inner door. I don't always WANT assistance, but I am ALWAYS grateful when it is offered. I thanked them profusely then proceeded to the hostess stand where two of the employees were standing and watching the restaurant patrons who got up from their meals to assist me.
Seriously. The employees saw me coming and struggling just to walk, let along handle the doors, but neither offered to assist. Instead two seated patrons got up from their table and cheerfully gave me a hand. That should have been my first clue I was going to face challenges here. One of the hosts, a young man bearing menus waited for me to toddle across the foyer. The conversation went as follows:
Host: How many will be in your party.
Me: Two
Host: Would you like to sit upstairs?
Me (Somewhat baffled by the question, I looked around. The restaurant is fairly empty and mostly on one level. I look down at my rolling walker and then back at the young man): Is there a ramp?
Host: No.
Me (after a pause): Elevator?
Host (laughing): No, it's only two stairs.
Me (Now I am getting irritated. Irritation brings out my sarcasm. I again scan the dining area on my level, take a quick glance down at the rolling walker, then look back at the host): How much do you dead lift?
Host (nervous and confused): What?
Me: I think that answers my question. No, I can't do stairs, (as I speak, I glance down at the rolling walker in front of me) my equipment isn't designed for stairs, so something on this level would be better.
Host: Oh, would you prefer a booth or a table?
Me: Either, as long as there is room for my equipment so it won't be in your way.
The host then proceeds to sit me in a booth. Mom joins me and we are perusing the menu when the second host comes to the table.
Hostess (places her hand on my walker): I'm going to need to move this.
Me: What? Where? (I grab the walker handle to keep her from taking it)
Hostess (indicated the other side of the partition dividing the foyer from the dining room): Just around the corner, up by the register.
Me (now pissed off): Uh, no. This is what I use to walk. I'll need it if there should be an emergency or if I want to use the restroom. The walker stays. I didn't seat myself here, but if it will help, I'll be happy to fold it up so it takes less space.
All of this before my first cup of coffee!
Let's not forget I'm hungry too!
The food was good and the waitress seemed to have no problem moving around my walker, even after the same clueless host proceeded to seat a party with walkers and other equipment at the table right next to our booth! Never mind the restaurant was still mostly empty and there were an abundance of tables with plenty of space for mobility devices. It made for a rather tight squeeze for the waitstaff and a navigation challenge for me when it was time to leave.
I am flattered that people see the person and not the disability. However, it would be nice for people to take into account the very visible equipment I need to move around and to be conscious, on some level, of my ability to move. For instance, have you ever had to ask directions in a restaurant?
Yep, I did after being left behind by my host in a restaurant that had multiple rooms through which I had to navigate between tightly placed diners. Not sure why it was so important to seat me and my walker at the back of the restaurant when there were ample seats near the front.
It's worse when I have my mobility scooter.
I get that it takes up room and restaurants only have so much space. I'm not a monster. I understand if the scooter needs to be moved out of the way by one of my own party during a busy time of day. However, we try not to patronize eating establishments during their peak times to avoid any difficulties. Therefore, there really isn't any reason to take all of the chairs away from the table because I rolled in the door. If you're not sure of my seating preference, you could ask. Why? The scooter I usually use doesn't have a swivel seat. I like to sit at the table, like everyone else.
But please don't ask if I really need the scooter, or if I couldn't just leave it at the door and walk. Yes, I need it. That's why I have it. I'm not looking for special treatment, I'm just looking for the same access and common courtesy given to everyone else.
And... maybe just a bit of common sense.
Are staff really going "out of their way" to hold an entryway door or walk a little slower so people can keep up with you? Is it too much to ask a patron if they need assistance with the 300lb bathroom door they are obviously struggling to open?
I wish I could say this experience was an exception. Unfortunately, it's not. There is no reason for this to be the case. So I will continue my crusade to educate and inform, and in some cases, sarcastically respond to the incredible nonsense that my mobility challenges provide.
In the meantime, I'm off to my next adventure!
