A better, brighter New Year!

The New Year is Upon Us!

   Break out the New Year's resolutions, cause this year is going to be the year to beat all years! The
gardens will be greener, the house will be cleaner and the lottery numbers will all be winners.

   Not that this year was all bad...

   We enjoyed concerts and recitals. Visiting friends and family. Watching parades, riding our bikes and swimming in the hot sun. We took a vacation to Hannibal, MO and joined a frog jumping competition for the first time. We celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary and took a trip for just us adults!

 

But I have to admit, it did have some hiccups. 

   For one, the garden was not green, unless you counted the weeds. You see, we didn't actually plant anything this year. Mind you, we had strawberry plants that returned to yield one or two juicy fruits, but aside from a decorative weed that sported lantern-like blossoms,
we pretty much had four foot dandelions and sticker bushes.  On the bright side, not a lot of weeding! So maybe a resolution of a greener garden is not all that appealing after all...

This before new columns!

   The house certainly wasn't clean this year, so there is hope that the next year will be better. After all, we won't be re-doing the kitchen, putting on a new roof, adding new siding and gutters, and installing flooring in the attics to make them more usable. I have to admit, the end result of all this labor looks terrific!
Should I mention how much warmer it all is with new insulation? Or how much easier to use the attics with real floors?


   Of course all that work means that the rugs throughout the house have suffered and the paint everywhere but the kitchen now looks shabby. Perhaps a cleaner house is not in the cards for next year...

   But surely the lottery numbers have to yield better results than this year? Well, they should if we actually remember to play the lottery next year. Adding that to the calendar sounds do-able. Now if I could just keep a dollar or two in my pocket...

Oh well, ring in the new, ring out the old!

With it's promises yet unbroken, it has endless appeal. Everything can be accomplished, all our goals, hope and dreams fulfilled...

Might even get the wash done!

Tis the season.... bird's eye view.

   The writer has left her lap-top open on the table once again and gone off to collect warm clothes from the dryer. Seems like she is doing that a lot lately. With the onset of winter, the whole family has begun wearing lots and lots of clothes. Since she will be gone for a while, I thought I would help her out. After cleaning the keyboard, I took a look at what she was writing. It was awful. Knowing I had some time, I decided I could help. I started with the delete key. As I deleted whole words and sentences, I began to wish my family could do the same with all the activities they seem to be doing. After all, I haven't seen them as much as I would like lately. They are out an awful lot. Seems like there is an endless stream of concerts and recitals and events! When they are home, they always seem to be doing things that just aren't normal. Like putting up a tree.

A FAKE tree, in the house. 

    At first, I thought this might be pretty cool. But then, they put lights on it, followed by decorations hung by hooks and ribbon. As if this weren't enough, they added two types of garland and sprinkled it with tinsel. The whole thing is topped off with an angel in a white dress holding two candles. (Incidentally, the angel doesn't light up like the rest of the tree.) When I flew around it a couple of times to check it out, the kid suggested I might want to land on it. AS IF! Thank heavens they put it in the corner out of my flying zones.

    But they didn't stop there, noooo, they just had to go and add decorations to every flat surface the house has to offer! There are garlands and figurines and snow globes. Stuff that lights up and makes noise. They even had the nerve to put little snowmen up on my window sills. While I tolerated the rest of the holiday decor, the snowmen were a bit much, so I moved them...to the floor.

   No sooner did I take care of this, then a new madness started. What was left of the clear surfaces were soon covered in cards of all shapes and sizes. I read a few; they mostly said Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays. I quickly discovered that these were far more entertaining than the other decorations. Not only are they fun to chew, but a couple flaps of my wings and they scatter everywhere! I can proudly report there are now at least three holiday letters behind the couch. 

    Just when I thought things were going to settle down, they began to go shopping! After these excursions, each of my family locks themselves in various rooms while playing Christmas music and emerges with wrapped packages that they deposit under the tree. Moreover, I am NOT supposed to chew on these wrappings.

Couldn't they just stick to writing cards?

   I could do a holiday newsletter for them. We could put feathers in with the letter. (I have a lot of extras as I replace my fall feathers with much warmer winter ones.) Maybe have a little hot cocoa and watch a movie together.

   I suppose they might slow down after the holidays and take a breather, but I kinda doubt that...

   There are paint chips stuck to the living room wall. Oh well, I hear the writer coming back, time to clear those silly snowmen off my windowsill.

   I wonder if I should mention to my family that the poor shepherd in the nativity scene has no head?

- Chirp

Dashing thru the stores...and out of them as fast as possible!

   I went to go Christmas shopping a few days after Thanksgiving. 

• No packed parking lots
• No crowded stores
• No empty shelves
• No long lines

   I bought only a few items and got out of the store as quickly as possible. I didn't even purchase everything that I had on my list. It had to be about the worst experience I have had this holiday season.

Wait...what? 

   I know, it sounded like I had ideal shopping conditions. So why did I pull an Ebenezer Scrooge and hightail it out of there like I was being chased by Christmas Yet-To-Come? What made me run for the Grinch Cave in the lonely snow covered hills without first collecting the items on my well prepared list? Did the store not have the goods I was looking for? Was my wallet empty?  Or did I simply lack the holiday spirit?

Nope. It was the store.

   But they were decorated for the season, they had all the items on my list and a shopping cart ready and waiting for me. Well, it became evident the moment I pushed open the door that they didn't want me there. Even though my husband and I were the only ones in the store. The message became clearly evident as we tried to shop, but after about ten minutes, gave up and checked out with only a few items that were on our list.

It was just too ((loud))!!

    I wish I could say this was the only store where I had this experience. Unfortunately, loud music seems to be en vogue. I have been treated to ear-splitting renditions of Do they Know it's Christmas? and I am Santa Claus in numerous retail establishments that see these selections as fitting background music to showcase their products. Thinking perhaps my store selection was at fault, I tried up-scaling my purchase points only to discover that these emporiums felt compelled to play Deck the Halls and Jingle Bells so loud that I had to shout in order to converse with my shopping partners.

Talking to check out clerks, store employees and managers did no good, they simply shrugged.

Perhaps they couldn't hear me.

   Maybe they didn't want to hear me. It is an accepted fact that loud music is typically played in restaurants to encourage diners to eat quickly and leave to make room for more customers; alternately, retail stores choose quieter selections to encourage shoppers to linger and purchase more goods. 

My take-away: over the holidays, retail stores just don't want me there...they must want me to shop online instead.

I do pity the employees trapped in the store...good thing I don't work in retail...I would insist, per OSHA standards, they provide me with ear plugs.

   But now, a few days away from Christmas I am faced with a dilemma, if I shop on the internet, my goods will not arrive in time for the holiday celebration. And underneath the tree is looking barren.

   A quick Google search looking for quiet stores to shop in turns up lots of articles geared toward retailers to help them select appropriate music (and volume) for their stores. Go figure. But unfortunately no one seems to read anymore. Gritting my teeth, I venture out once more...

   And find three stores that do not play any music at all! Shout out to Aldi, Home Depot and Target. Okay, so I guess some folks do read. As a result, they receive a portion of our hard earned income and I can return home with my purchases for a nice quiet cup of hot chocolate...

 ummm...maybe?

Lessons during Advent

   Advent is a season of preparing. It is a time of reflection; where we are spiritually and where we strive to be. It is a time to realign our lives to be better versions of ourselves, to redirect our energies to the world around us, sharing our time, our talents, and our funds, to serve. It is a time of getting ready.

At first glance, this looks pretty serious, and not all that much fun.

   Although this dignified season doesn't seem that it would elicit much joy, don't be deceived. Heartfelt and sincere acts of kindness and service often break out into bursts of joy. Joy that we wish to share with others around us. This joy often manifests in two ways; having parties and giving gifts.

   Interestingly enough, within our parish's religious education program, we are discouraged from both activities. You would think that as Christians we would be all about celebrating the season. Now don't get me wrong, I am pretty much in agreement with our religious ed director. The reasons given seem pretty valid. We share classroom space with the church school, so the classrooms are not our own. Various food allergies make snacks downright dangerous. To be honest, I would prefer to avoid having an emergency situation in my classroom or creating one for other students who need to use the desks and space. Shared space also makes it difficult to set up and arrange these celebrations. Finally, giving of gifts could make siblings not in the class upset.

While the reasons are valid, the logic seems to be flawed. 

 
    For starters, it is still Advent. My students are already confused when we sing The 12 Days of Christmas; they don't know when these 12 days take place. A party of games and fun snacks isn't going to help them learn what the season means to us as Catholics. Suggested giving projects for the class are much more effective and just as much fun. Yes, my class will play a game near the end of the session (we often do) to encourage merriment and bring joy to others. Guess what the theme will be this time...yep, about giving. Giving gifts of service as well as material goods. Giving our forgiveness to others and giving ourselves over to our God.

   While I am on the topic of gift giving, I think we struggle to much to make everything equal and fair. This is really a disservice to our children. Not all children will get gifts just because their siblings do. Just like some of them won't be invited to the same parties as their siblings. Disappointment is a natural part of learning. Without it, we lack the mechanisms that help us cope with the world in which we live. Believe me, I know first hand how hard it is for a little one to cope with disappointment, but I suggest that we not let that deter us from our inclination to give a child a gift to make them feel special and an important part of our community. Instead I suggest not giving a child a gift unless it encourages a sense of community, enabling the recipient to share and lets them know that they are a special part of the world.

   In the past my students have received (electric) candles to light the family dinner table, mini-games to play with family and friends, and small art projects that they can make into gifts for others. This year will be no different. My students are too special to me to pass an opportunity to remind them that they are cherished. Further, it will give them an important opportunity to reach out to their community in turn. Some of that community will include their siblings.

   So have a Wonderful Advent. But watch out, come January, we are going to have a party to celebrate that Christmas has finally arrived and what it truly means to us as Christians. (Sans food, of course!)

 

What is it about a cup of coffee?

 There is something magical about a cup of coffee.

   Perhaps it is the caffeine. That extra boost of energy that gets a person going. The wake up zing that puts a pep in one's step. The much needed jolt after a sleepless night. The mid afternoon pick-me-up that lets a body keep going.

 

 Or maybe it is the fact that this cup marks a much needed respite from a busy day. A relief from the grind and chance to momentarily put on the brakes and rewind. A chance to step away from the tedium of chores and errands for a bit of respite.

   It might be the reset button in a hectic day that is part of a hectic week which is the norm of a hectic life. A legitimate and justifiable break, marked by a journey that requires leaving the desk/tasks/errands and making a trip to a location of java rejuvenation. Just the act of getting a cup of coffee can be a physical break from whatever activity a person is doing to retrieve the delightful cup.


   Possibly it is magical because it becomes a chance for friends to meet up and talk. To gather and

exchange news and life stories. An excuse to sit down and share some time together, even if only for a moment. Perhaps a reminder that it is not just at holidays, weddings and funerals that we should get together and share our lives with one another.

   It could be because most coffee is warm and helps warm the insides when things are cold outside. With this warmth comes a cosmic sense of well being. Holding a warm mug and breathing in the warm aroma can force the eyes to squeeze shut and conjure up images of comfort and contentment resulting in brief daydreams. (Do not practice this in the car while driving!)

 
   For all we know, it could be the liquid that helps launch you into an adventure that occurs in another time and place; a beverage that tells your body it is time to shift gears and reside elsewhere for a time.

   Conceivably it is none of these things in the physical reality, but what the coffee represents, that is magical. Perhaps you don't actually need it to wake up (lucky you) or to keep going during a busy day (must be nice). Maybe there is no actual break with the coffee that is associated with the cup, but just the idea of a break that is so wonderful.  Perchance today's cup only brings a reminder of the last time you sat down with a friend and chatted. And it is possible (albeit unlikely) that you prefer it cold and there is no magical warmth that fills your insides.

   Whatever the reason, it is always depressing to find that you have come to that last sip of delightful goodness, no matter how warm or cold it might be.





   Nothing is sadder than an empty cup!

The Lady doth Protest

   For the last week there has been nothing but name calling, finger pointing and unrest. A person can't turn on the TV, read the paper or even scroll their favorite social media without being bombarded by the anger and division that threatens to tear the social fabric of our country. The upset and frustration are draining.

Almost makes me wish for the good ole days of political ads with negative campaigns of last week.

    Worse than being emotionally and physically drained is the sense of helplessness that threatens to overwhelm. I suppose I could protest, but I am not entirely sure what I should protest. The candidate who won? That was the point of voting in the election process. The candidate who lost?  I thought that was settled by the election. The election process governed by pretty much the same rules that have been in place since the birth of our country? Seems a little late for that. Guess I am not much of a protester, unless you count the actual vote that I cast last week.

I protest the divisions. I protest the anger and violence. I am protesting the loud and angry protests.

Everyone seems to have a paddle these days.

   We all know what happens when everyone has a paddle and strives to row their own way. At least I do, having spent some quality time with kids on a lake. We went in circles. Although they each had their own ideas on how to reach the shore, it wasn't until they started to work together that we made any real progress. In the end we reached our destination and enjoyed a meal together.

   No one had to compromise their personal beliefs or moral values. They simply had to accept one

another and work together. Was that so hard? Well, I have to admit, I was a bit worried that we would not be having dinner. That quite possibly a heated battle would break out with all of the children wielding paddles and everyone would wind up in the lake, cold and wet and hungry and rather bruised. At one point I thought about throwing them out of the boat.

So what did I do?

   Reminded them that they were brothers and sisters (or at the very least, cousins). Reminded them to love one another. Reminded them that I loved them, unconditionally, even if I didn't agree with them.

So what do I do now?

   I am going love. No matter what race or religion, regardless of gender, age, sexual preference, economic status, ideology or political affiliation. I am going to remind people that they are all brothers and sisters and should love one another, even if they don't agree. It won't be easy, but I will resist the urge to push others out of the boat for smoother sailing.

   I haven't given up my moral beliefs or changed how I feel about the issues that swirl around us in our country today. I don't agree with all my friends and family. But I protest the division and instead seek the healing that can only come of love. I vow to love despite our differences. Because in the end, I pray that we all reach the shore.

John 13:34 - I give you a new commandment: love one another. As I have love you, so you must love one another. (Good News Translation)

Castaphobia- Yikes, and the election is Tuesday!

   There have been a lot fears that have come to light in the current presidential election.

   Some folks are afraid of the major candidates offered by our two biggest political parties. We have both Tumphobia and Clintonphobia. These are followed closely by Republicanphobia and Democraticphobia (not to be confused with Demophobia, which is the fear of crowds, regardless of their political affiliation).

   I personally am afraid of turning on the TV. Programming seems to mostly consist of mudslinging ads from one candidate or another. Thank heavens for Netflix! As the impending election day looms ever nearer, seems like all we want to do is escape the constant bombardment of negativity and threats of doom and gloom that peer around the corner no matter what choice we might make.

Let's hear it for some distracting pictures of nature.

Is it me, or did the first picture look a lot like that people-eating plant from Little Shop of Horrors?

    I am beginning to think that each of the candidates being offered has this plant like potential to devour our nation. News on my feed shows churches being burned with threatening candidate slogans written on them to scare people from voting. Early polling places are not so numerous and have garnered some long lines - and who wants to stand in line with individuals who's political affiliation may not align with yours? Like being trapped in a pod you cannot escape.

   Okay, so maybe the pictures were not all that distracting.

   I think I am just as anxious as many of my fellow Americans.

   Perhaps what I need is some silly social media. Well, after a quick look, perhaps not. Amidst the cuddly cat videos and pictures from recent vacations, there are the articles and arguments, supporting and trashing both major and minor political candidates alike.

I have read and read already. I think I am about as informed as I am going to get.

   I am pretty sure I am coming down with Politicophobia.

   Currently I am picking out my outfit for Tuesday. Pretty sure it will include plate armor and helm. Do they allow swords at polling places? I feel that I will need one. Maybe just a battle-axe. 

This is scarier than Halloween.

A Halloween Tale for Grownups

   It was a cool and crisp fall day. Bill sat at the table staring out the big window and watched the trees, decked out in their autumn finery, cast batches of leaves about their back yard. His wife Jen joined him with two steaming cups of coffee and took the seat across from him.
   "Thanks" he said, taking the proffered mug.
   "Looks like you are going to have to clean out the gutters on the garage again." Jen commented as she sat down. "Think you will have time before the rain comes?"
   "Nothing wrong with the gutters." muttered Bill, as he glanced toward the garage that sat a little back from the house.
   "I think you will have to do something with them." Jen nodded her head. "Remember last year."
  "Woman, can't a man enjoy a cup of coffee?" groused Bill.
   "Fine, fine. I didn't mean right this second, now did I? Don't be such a grump. Enjoy your coffee and the view. It is such a nice view. I am so glad we decided to put this window in when we remodeled the kitchen. It makes such a difference, and it is so nice to sit here with coffee and watch the birds."
   "Hard to watch birds when someone is constantly handing out chores."
   "Oh, drink your coffee, you old grump." laughed Jen. She leaned back in her chair and tucked her graying hair behind her ear. They sat in silence for a few moments enjoying their coffee. "You know, now that we are both fully retired and this kitchen project is completely done, I was thinking we should take a trip."
   "Oh yeah? Where were you thinking." replied Bill with interest. A smile played about his lips.
   "I don't know, somewhere with sand and beaches I think. Get a feel for what we want to do next."
   "Anything but chores. I feel I have done nothing but work since I retired." A frown creased his forehead as he watched a car pull in front of the garage. "Isn't that Amy's car? You expecting her?"
   Jen nodded. "It is, and she looks like she has the boys with her."
   "Why aren't they in school? Isn't this a weekday?"
   "How should I know? I didn't even know she was coming." Jen got up to answer the back door as Amy herded two rowdy boys up the stairs to the back deck. "Amy, " she said opening the door. "Such a surprise."
   The boys shot through the door like dual cannonballs.
   "Boys!" called Amy. "Your shoes. Oh, they just don't listen." she laughed breathlessly.
   "Don't worry about it, it's not important. Come in, we were just having a cup of coffee. What brings you here?"
   "Oh I would love to have a cup. We were just passing though the neighborhood and I thought "You should stop and visit Jen and Bill' OH BOYS, DON'T DO THAT." she called. "They just got those new tools this morning, aren't they adorable?"
   "They look real." said Bill eyeing one of the duo as he hammered on an open cabinet door. "Stop that." he directed. "How come they are not in school?" He watched as the boys moved out of sight behind the kitchen island. A muffled banging noise began to fill the kitchen.
   "Oh they are real! Aren't they just great?" Amy swept into Jen's vacated seat. "We stopped this morning to pick up Starbucks and as the boys were getting their coffees, we saw them in the window and just had to have them!"
   Bill sputtered into his cup. "The boys had their own coffee? Aren't they a little young for that? They are what, 5 and 7?"
   "She doesn't mean real coffee, silly." said Jen bringing Amy her coffee.
   "Oh sure, they get their own coffee. They tried mine once and they really liked it. So I let them get their own. Sure beats sharing mine!" laughed Amy.
   "So do the boys have no school today?" asked Jen changing the subject as Bill purpled. From the corner of his eye, Bill thought he saw one of the boys leave the kitchen.
   "Oh they do, but it was so nice out, I thought we would take a day off..." Amy trailed off as her phone rang from the depths of her cavernous purse. "Hello?" she answered.
   From behind the island Bill heard a sawing noise.
  "Hey!" Bill exclaimed as he jumped up. "No sawing!" he moved around the counter to intercept the small blond haired boy.
   "Yes, I can come right away... Tommy, don't do that Honey....sorry, I was talking to Tommy. He just got a new tool set and they are the most adorable...."
   The blond haired boy named Tommy scooted around the island as Bill rounded the corner.
   "Give me that saw." said Bill as he surveyed the damage. "And where is your brother?"
  "Bye." Amy hung up. "Jen, I have to run a quick errand. That was Kathy and she wants me to come pick her up, her car is in the shop. I know you don't mind if I leave the boys here a little while? They are such a pain to get in and out of the car. You are such a dear. Thanks!"
   Before Jen could answer, Amy swooped up her purse and headed out the door. "No!" cried Bill to the closing door. A clinking came from the next room.
  "Oh my, what is that noise?" asked Jen looking bemused.
   "That damn kid put a huge cut in the cabinets with that little saw!" growled Bill.
  "Do you hear that noise?" asked Jen again. She frowned as she watched Amy's car back down the driveway.
   "And there is a hole in the wall next to the fridge!" roared Bill as he stormed about the kitchen. "We just redid this room and those little monsters are undoing it!"
   "Oh dear." said Jen nodding her head. "I hope Amy is not too long."
From the next room there was a crash and the sound of shattering glass, followed by giggles. Bill and Jen looked at each other and raced from their damaged kitchen... Moments later, two small blond heads peeped though the new kitchen window eyeing the discarded coffee on the table. With a miniature screw drivers they began tapping on the window.

Just pack and go, right?

   Recently, my husband and I celebrated our 25th Wedding Anniversary. To mark this special occasion we decided to take a trip, as we had planned years ago when we were first married. Years and years and years and years ago. Back then we had talked about taking a romantic, exotic, and adventurous trip down the Nile.

Our current status is typically in De-nial, so the trip was simplified.

   Being a little more conservative on our budget these days, we decided to settle on a less expensive getaway. We opted for Atlanta. Mostly because it would still be warm in the fall...and the airline tickets were cheap. But the important part of our trip was that it would be just the two of us going. No kids. No friends. No relatives. No pets. Just the two of us celebrating 8 wonderful years together. Um, I mean 25.

   The odd part was, I didn't want to go.

   Now don't get me wrong, I love to travel. And I love my husband, more than cheese and sliced bread and almost more than dark chocolate. My daughter can drive me nuts just like any other kid, but I love her, too. Yes, there are times I like to get away from my family and my friends as well as the bills and the chores and the endless to-do list. But if planning this trip had been left up to me, it might not have happened. Thankfully, my husband loves travel planning. So all I had to do was pack and go.

    Sorta. 

   Our anniversary is in September, which meant that our daughter was back in school. Before we could even book the flights (wait, what, we have to fly?) I had to make sure the trip was planned out during a week that we would not be missing any important dates at school. Due to job changes and a new work schedule for my husband, the date selection process became more complicated.

   Having passed this first hurdle, accounts needed to be double checked for any expenses that might come up while we were away, as well as making sure all the regular bills were paid. I know you can pay bills from anywhere these days thanks to technology. But seriously, who wants to pay bills while sipping margaritas on a beach?   

    Since my folks would be staying at our house to keep my daughter's schedule as smooth as possible in our absence, the house needed to be cleaned top to bottom. Not an easy task when you are finishing up several home improvement projects. Nor easy when you are a confirmed neat freak either. I managed to refrain from cleaning the ceilings. Mostly.

   This arrangement also meant advanced meal planning for easy meals. My folks were already taking a great deal of time out of their schedules (you would not believe how busy retired people are!) and doing a lot of work to care for our girl. I wanted things as simple as possible. I needed a meal plan, so I blew the dust off my cookbooks and started planning. Being out of practice, this took longer than I expected. After which I needed to go grocery shopping. Since updating our kitchen over the summer, food choices in the house had become interesting and unusual. The start of school had not made it any less unusual... just more interesting.

   Next I put together a daily planner. Since my daughter enjoys many activities, her schedule can vary from day to day. This way my folks could know when to expect my daughter to arrive home from school as well as any weekend activities that she would need to attend. Rides were coordinated for lessons when there were conflicts with my parent's schedules. I updated the morning and evening checklists for my daughter to help her remember things like taking her instrument to school and brushing her teeth.

   Then I did a mountain of laundry and packed.

   Packing was a lot harder for me since we would not have our camper with us. I had to remember to pack all the stuff I would not have normally thought about since it is usually in our travelling house. Thank heavens we went to a city where I could pick up all the stuff I forgot! 

    After all this prep, we were off to the airport (gulp). I am not nervous about flying, just getting through security. So we left early. Really, really, really early. Fortunately, security was a breeze. But no sooner was I through that hurdle, I found I missed my daughter. As our trip progressed, I kept thinking about all the stuff she would like. I missed waking her up in the morning and tucking her in at night. Okay, I didn't miss waking her up, but I did miss her hugs. In the end I survived.  We all did.

   Turned out this trip was an opportunity for growth for all of us. My daughter discovered she liked getting up early each morning (ugh) to take care of making her breakfast and getting her lunch together. Though she missed us while we were away, she felt more independent and took on responsibilities. She began doing things like homework, music practice and picking up her room without being reminded. (I have not ruled out the possibility of aliens taking over her body.)

   My husband and I rediscovered that we enjoy traveling together. Just the two of us. We are just as adventurous (though our muscles reminded us we are not as young as we used to be), continue to enjoy trying new things, and still crazy in love with each other. Or maybe just crazy...

   Despite my initial reluctance to leave my daughter behind and wander off with my hubby to explore and reconnect, I really enjoyed our time together as a couple.  It made all the planning and advance prep worth it.

But next time...we take the camper!

   

Public Service Announcement for the Swift and Swifter

   It all started out with a friendly visit with my friend's cat...

   The cutie who loves to help with my Bible Study homework. My friend asked me to drop in and check on him while she was away for a day or two. The cat and I get along great and enjoy each other's company, so I readily agreed. Besides, it gave me a change of scenery and a helper for my homework!

   Yesterday's visit was no different than any other, we cuddled, played, cleaned the litter box together (yes, he "helps") and put out fresh food and water. We did some reading and a bit of the homework for class. It was time for me to go, so I wished him goodbye and locked the door behind me. I put my study materials in the back seat of the car and closed the door.

   And this is when things went horribly wrong.  It took me seconds (hours?) for my brain to register that I could only see half my thumb. Perhaps a few more to register that the other half was in the door. The closed door. I grabbed the handle and yanked the door open. The rest of the thumb was there.

This was the point at which the pain sensors caught up with the rest of my brain.

   OW, OW, OW, OW, IT HURTS, IT HURTS, DA## IT HURTS. I grabbed the keys from my purse, closed the door (without my hand in it this time), pressed the lock button on my fob and vaulted the stairs to the door, miraculously pulling out the house key as I did. Smoothly I unlocked the door, yanked it closed and locked it behind me. 

Looking back, I do believe this is the smoothest I have ever entered a building while swearing.

Sometimes I impress even myself.

   I sprinted to the kitchen, dropping my purse in route and swiftly pulled open the freezer drawer. It was stuffed full of frozen food. Go figure, they keep frozen food in the freezer. Since I did not think the frozen chicken would do me much good, I pulled open the top drawer. More frozen food.

   The cat joined me as I rifled frantically though the food looking for ice packs. He delighted in batting around freezer bags that I inadvertently knocked out. At the bottom of the drawer, I found an ice tray... filled not with ice, but green stuff.

For the love of God, who keeps green stuff in their ice trays?

  As I wondered about this mystery, my throbbing finger decided to bleed. I was contemplating the frozen chicken when the cat batted a lumpy baggie under the open drawers. It could have been frozen vodka, but to me it looked like a homemade ice pack. Tossing the baggie on the counter, I turned on the sink and rinsed my bloody hand, wrapped it in tissue and applied ice.

   I then sat on the floor and pet the cat as my injured hand ached from under the ice/vodka pack. After a while, I picked up the frozen goods off the floor, checked to make sure I hadn't bled all over the inside of the freezer, and closed the door. Then I snuck a peek at my hand.

   It still hurt like the devil, but I didn't think it looked all that bad. Not even all that swollen. And I could bend it, so not bad, right? I decided that I should drive home and baby it a little.

   It was on the way out the door once more that I realized it was my right hand. Did I mention that I was right handed? It made the drive home really suck.

   After ibuprofen and lunch, it was still sore, but considerably better, so I went about my day. Sore, but no big deal. I was fine.

   Till the next morning. Perhaps a sheet brushed it. Or maybe it was a light cool breeze from our open

window. Searing pain brought me up in a hurry. And my thumb was not looking better. The nail was now very dark, the underside red and bruised and I could now barely bend it. Crap. I was going to have to see a doctor.

   I took more ibuprofen. I sent my daughter off to school. I tried to nurse the thumb with a real ice pack, but the digit was having nothing to do with anything, cold or otherwise, touching it.

   I called the doctor.

   They referred me to a walk-in clinic for emergency aid where they could do X-rays and stuff.

   I made my husband drive.

   Bumps in the road made it hurt. Thankfully the staff were all kind. They made a hole in the nail using (a medical grade) heat wand and drained the blood from under the nail, which greatly relieved the pressure. The X-rays found what might be a tiny fracture or an anomaly, which means I have to wear a brace until I can see a hand specialist in about a week or so to review.

   Unfortunately the tip of the thumb was too tender for the small brace. So they resorted to the larger brace...

Did I mention that I am right handed?

I also bought my friend an official ice pack. Turns out she keeps ice in the freezer in the garage. Well,

now she keeps an ice pack in the house freezer.

Insurance - The Trilogy?

 Just when I thought my insurance adventures were over...

   The last month has been filled with insurance adventures. First was Insurance Search, a Cautionary Tale, in which I shared my mistakes of my initial search for private insurance.

   In my next post, Insurance: The Sequel, I continued my journey of insurance selection. Fortunately I have advisers and friends who knew what they were doing and could help me ask the right questions and use the correct website Healthcare.gov to search the market place for pricing and options.  If you don't have the fortune of a good friend like mine, the official website offers resources to find people and groups in your area (for free) to help you apply. Which is more than I could say for my state website... my state's official website offered several links for health insurance, but I could not find the one to the  Healthcare Marketplace!

   But there is no such thing as smooth sailing, is there? No sooner than the boat was launched, seas got rough and the sky clouded up! You guessed it, we ran into problems.

       First problem: I am currently on a specialty drug. Before deciding on the policy, I had contacted the insurance company to determine if this medication was covered and, if so, under what pricing tier. I wanted to understand my payment responsibility ahead of time. Most of the medications we currently take we could look up online through the Market Place, but not this one. After much effort (and talking to several individuals) it was determined that the medication was covered by the insurance company. However, the pharmacist could not tell me the tier associated with that drug nor the cost since this drug was outside the tier structure. Further complicating the matter, I was not yet a member of their plan.

   Next, I contacted the drug company to confirm they had payment assistance programs. I was relieved to find that they did and that I was eligible, but without being enrolled in the new insurance program, there was little they could tell me as to what this entailed.

      Having gathered information and read through materials to the best of my ability., I made what I hoped was an educated decision. I was feeling pretty good that we were able to obtain affordable health care and remain insured. I signed up for the policy that seemed best suited to our needs and I sent in a payment right away to prevent any delay in coverage.

I did mention that I spent a lot of time on the phone?

      Within a few short days we received our cards! Now covered under a new plan, I decided to continue to pursue the few questions that could not be answered previously. Was I going to be able to continue my therapy using the specialty drug? Since I now had a card and ID number, I was hoping to get some answers to my questions they would not provide to non-members.

    Easier said than done. Because the medication falls under the category of specialty drug, it is outside the tier structure and turns out is not covered the same as all other medications. (Insert panic attack when I was first told - wrongly - that none of our prescriptions were covered before the deductible was paid.) For the specialty drug in questions, I would need to pay my entire deductible. After that, they were pretty sure it fell in the category where I would pay a whopping 30% of the medication (a hefty sum of money). But they could not tell me what that amount would be until they received a claim. In other words, I would not know my cost until AFTER I had received the medication therapy.

Well, if I couldn't afford it, wouldn't that be a little too late to find out?

   Further discussion determined that in order for the insurance to give me an estimate, I would need to provide them with a diagnostic code, procedure code, provider types, provider number, billing codes and billing amounts for each (just to name a few), all of which I could obtain from the medical group that provided the service. At this point, they had already approved the medication therapy through a doctor request for authorization.

   So now I spoke with the medical group. I sent emails, I made phone calls. I took notes. In the meantime I received feedback on what I could expect the drug company to assist with. I also decided to get set up with the insurance pharmacy. That was when I discovered that we were never fully entered into the insurance system and that for all intents and purposes, we kinda didn't exist.

Guess who made more phone calls!

  At the end of the week, I determined three things: 

1. I take good notes and people find me friendly on the phone.
2. I like chat rooms and email as they provide written documentation to refer to at a later date.
3. I could never hold down a full time job and juggle all the follow up I have had to do on our insurance (all of which had to be done during business hours). 

   Our insurance is being updated as I type. I have decided to take a break and come back to the problem of specialty medication at a future date and have canceled my current therapy. I won't die, but will be living dangerously in the disease management arena. As I have neither time nor wine needed to cope with the issue at the moment, I think I am okay with that...for now.

   Why? Because I have enough stress right now....Did I mention we are having work done on our house that started before our major life changing event and all of the insurance issues that came with it? 

Chair memories.

   Chairs don't have memories. At least I don't think they do - there was a whole episode on Sesame Street with John Cleese about inanimate objects not having feelings, so my theory is, if inanimate objects don't have feelings, they don't have memories either. And what is on Sesamie Street must be true, right?

But I have memories and some of my favorite ones are of chairs!

   My most recent memory (well, it is a borrowed memory) is of Dad's new chair. It is one of those remote control models that heats up, massages the back, lays flat with the foot rest out, and tips up to make getting out of easier. Not that he needs it to tip up to get out, but he does like it to lay back nice and flat for napping. All of this is done with an attached remote control.

It is a fun chair! Here the stuffed animals are enjoying it as a slide.

   The memory is actually Mom's memory, but the story of the chair has made it my own. I guess you could say I sometimes live vicariously though the memories of others.

   As Mom tells the story, she and Dad were sitting in the living room together watching TV. She commented on what they were watching. Since Dad is rather hard of hearing, he leaned forward in his chair to listen to what she was saying. As he did so he accidentally sat on the remote control. He often sits on remote controls, as can be noted by the car doors sometimes opening randomly or the alarm going off. But I digress.
   
   Mom continued her explanation to Dad, and as she did so, the back of the chair began to slowly lay back. Dad listened intently, unaware that the chair he sat on was in motion. Mom seeing the chair moving, struggled to keep from smiling as it lay farther and farther back. Turns out the chair lays really far back - more than just flat - the back can nearly touch the floor!

   Conversation drew to an end, and Dad, satisfied that he had "heard" everything, leaned back. Only now the chair that had been in the sitting position was now more of a bed that tilted toward the floor. Unaware of the change, he was caught off guard. Back he went and up went his feet. Mom, unable to contain herself any longer, burst out into laughter. Dad, his head now near the floor and his feet higher than the rest of his body, struggled to get up and find the remote to the chair (he was now laying on the remote). At first he was going to be mad, but realizing the ridiculousness of his predicament, he too began to laugh.

   Heck, hearing the story the next day caused much laughter. It is amazing how the innocent misfortune of another can be such amusement for others. Well, he wasn't hurt, just rather surprised! Which reminds me of another, older chair story, from my days of working in an office setting...

   At this particular job, I worked in an open office setting, which means there were cubicles, but the walls did not go up more than 12", so you could see everyone an everything going on in the office. Even the president's office had glass walls, so he too could see all that happened in the office, from workers at their desks, to someone using the copier in the filing section of the office. I believe the conference room and the break room had walls, but I am guessing this was just because the designer

didn't like to watch people eat, and those are the places we would eat our lunches.

   As is often the case, furniture eventually wore out or broke, and like many offices, stuff did not always get disposed of in a timely manner... Enter the chair. One of the office chairs had lost one of its wheels. Unable to be repaired, a sign was affixed to the back of the chair that read "Broken, do not use." The chair was then promptly placed in the copier/filing area of the office where there were a few empty cubicles and then completely forgotten about.

   Well nearly forgotten about, anyway. We occasionally had computer consultants that would come into the office to work with staff on the programs that we used for business. It was during one such visit that our consultants (a husband and wife team) set up shop in the empty cubicles in the copier/filing area of the office. Unfortunately the "Broken, do not use" chair was still occupying this space. How it managed to lose its signage is a bit of a mystery.

   The consultants were great. They were quick and intuitive, responsive and hands-on team, amicable and very well liked.  During this particular visit, the husband of the team was setting up shop in the copier/mail area of the office while his wife, a few feet away in the employee cubicle section, was catching up with the staff. Suddenly, her male counterpart made an odd, strangled noise, all of us turned just in time to see him as he tumbled backward, feet flying in the air.

   It was minutes before any of us could stop laughing long enough offer assistance. My friend was the first to recover asking if he was all right between her tears. His wife in the meantime, had to sit down and hold her sides. Fortunately, he was only surprised and laughed along with the rest of us. He really was a good sport. I still giggle when I think of the expression on his face.

 Still don't know what became of the sign.

   What is it about chair misfortune that sparks such mirth?

And it is not just me, I bet you have chair memories too!

 

Insurance Search: The Sequel.

   After my first unsuccessful and rather disastrous foray into The Hunt for the New Insurance, I was a little shy about continuing my journey. But the clock was ticking and I needed to find coverage for my family before the dreaded COBRA kicked in and eradicated any savings we had managed to scavenge over the last few years.

   Quite frankly, I felt like I had walked into a GI-Joe episode and was in imminent danger of stepping on a land mine.

So I switched identities.

   "You can do this." I told myself.

  

              Then I called my best friend. I already saw the results of what I could do.

   My best friend knows what she is doing. I think I mentioned in a previous post that I had trusted advisers... After talking me off a windowsill and getting me to sit down, she fired up the internet and took me to the official government website to shop for insurance policies, Healthcare.gov.

   This was the Market Place site to compare and shop for insurance for individuals and families as well as for small business. Together (okay, she did most of the work) we navigated the site to create an account and answered questions to see if we qualified for any aid, if we could get coverage right away, and what type of insurance we were looking for.

   First there was all the personal information that I had to put in about my family. Stuff like birthdays and social security numbers and addresses and phone numbers. Did I mention that I was a little paranoid about giving up my phone number. I mean I did that once before and what did that get me? A bizillion phone calls, some of which proved to be just pure harassment. Which lead to a great education on call blocker features offered by my phone company and introduction to Nomorobo. Now this education has proved to be a great bonus as I no longer get all those pesky robot calls from the "IRS" and my "credit card," so I guess I really came out ahead. I trusted my friend and we moved forward. Actually I think she moved forward, I believe I was holding my breath.

   There were a LOT of questions. Well, maybe not quite so many questions if you consider that many of the questions asked were repeated two and maybe three times over. A few of these questions made me wonder... like the one asking if my minor child was married. I mean, really? Didn't we put in her birthday two questions ago? Just how many twelve year old children in the United States are married? I Googled it later and was blown away by what I learned. Did you know that in many states allow children as young as 12 to be married?  WHAT?

   But I digress. I was shopping for insurance. Well, I was answering questions anyway. Many, many, many questions. After what seemed an eternity of questions, we were able to submit our information and within moments, we were give many health plans to shop from. Right then, right on the computer. No message about you will be contacted shortly by qualified insurance carriers, no bombardment of phone calls, just a list that I could refine based on my coverage preferences. Moreover, there was premium price information, information on costs to see doctors and specialists as well as access to drug coverage information.

It was as if someone handed me a hot fudge sundae!

   Not to say that there wasn't a catch. My trusty advisers warned me away from two of the insurance companies who were no longer going to cover people on the Market Place at the end of this year. Making this decision once is hard enough, but to go through the process a second time because your carrier has opted out? Not going to happen if I could help it. 

   Now feeling confident, I saved my favorite insurance company policy picks on the site (you can do that!) so I could come back later to finish the process. Then I began the real work of research on the coverage. I have learned from family experience that just because the doctor is on the insurance company's list, doesn't mean that he or she accepts that insurance policy. Sometimes these lists are not updated as they should be. I wanted to review out of pocket costs for visits and medications, verify what pharmacies they require participants to use, and compare the new policy benefits to our previous benefits.

   On the phone once more, I confirmed with the doctor's offices that they were accepting one of the two policies that I was reviewing. I called the insurance company directly and spoke to their customer service to navigate the benefit pages on their website and I talked to their participating pharmacy to verify that the medications we used were covered and what pricing tier they would fall under. It appeared that all the other options for our coverage were about the same. Whatever you do, do NOT skip this step. No matter what the price, insurance will do you no good if it will not provide you with the services you need!

   Then I took a look at pricing. Surprise. We would pay less than we had under the work sponsored insurance plan. Medication co-pay would also be less expensive. Deductible and doctor visits were about the same, but hey, lets not get crazy here! After sitting down and reviewing with my spouse, we logged in under our account and hit the accept button for the choice that seemed the best for our family. I held my breath.

   No phone calls. No explosions outside the house. Just a message asking me to provide one or two documents to complete the process. I could even upload the documents right onto the Healthcare.gov website. I promptly scanned the documents using my handy dandy smartphone app CamScanner, then uploaded it to the website.

   Just like that, we were approved. All we needed to do was to pay for the first month and we were good to go. I wound up in a payment loop when I tried to set up payment on line, but a quick call to the insurance company I had selected (Blue Cross Blue Shield of Illinois) and I was able to square this away on the phone. 

   I can happily say we are insured. No insurance coverage gaps. No hard sell tactics. 

   Now onto my next adventure...

Dental plans!